Sunday, June 21, 2015

Update & Nike Run Pictures

My current state of mind is not what I want it to be. 

For years I've struggled with depression and it's had different effects on my life. In high school I was lucky to get a university acceptance letter. In my second semester my depression became horrible, I lost all motivation for school, and my grades didn't slip -- they plummeted. I was lucky to have a strong first semester and the ability to pull them up just at the end (with the help of medication) to squeak into school. 

Now, I just want to sleep. After being sick and losing our furry family member I've found it hard to bounce back. I'm constantly tired and just wanting to sleep. I've fallen three assignments behind in one of my accounting courses (thankfully due dates are just guidelines and as long as I have all of them in by the course end-date I will pass) and instead of feeling motivated to get them done I need feel like I'm being crippled with anxiety. 

Besides the Nike run and beach volleyball, I haven't been able to find the motivation to workout or run and it's weighing heavily on me. I know once I pull myself back into a routine that exercise will drastically improve my depression but beginning it is a struggle. 

I think I'm slowly coming back, though. I knocked out two assignments on Friday night and I'm working on two more to put me ahead. I skipped my long run this morning but I think I'm going to go a short one this afternoon, and move my long run to Wednesday morning. Yesterday I spent most of my day out of my house, away from my bed, and my mood greatly improved. This week I'm going to take my life one day at a time and continue to try to rise out of my depressed state. 

In the meantime, here's a few pictures from the Nike run. One, I love that they were free and Two, the smile on my face while running gives me hope. 

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